Alternative Methods Part 2.....or.....What I will force my husband to try in order to avoid IVF

So I find myself sitting in the very last row of seats in the back of the bus with four little bottles wrapped in foil tucked under my arm, inside my jacket, wondering if I'm far enough away from the electromagnetic waves or if I should get off the bus and walk in the -2 degree weather.

Ummm....wait....let me start this at the begining. 

What do you do if you realize that your baby makin' attempts aren't working out but you are against modern medical intervention? 

Visit a homeopathic doctor, of course.

Luckily, I happen to work with a chiropractor who is also a homeopathic nutritionist and a NET (neuroemotional technique) specialist.  After having gone through treatment with her (which I will touch on another time), I convinced my husband to see her.

The session started out normally enough.  Health history, talks about diet and exercise, some allergy testing.  And then she explained that she would like to give him some homeopathic medicine that would work to clean out his liver, spleen, bladder and testes.  And he said "okay" and told her to place the order for the medicine.

The medicine arrives and she gives it to me, along with the instructions.  And this is where it gets strange.......

The medicine, I'm told, will be adversely affected by electromagnetic fields.  She's wrapped it in foil and wants to know how I will get it home.  Being that it's freezing outside, I tell her that I'll be taking the bus home.  She makes a "tsk, tsk" noise and warns me to sit as far to the rear of the bus as I can, away from all the electric implements near the driver.  She stops short of telling me that I need to wrap my head in foil because the aliens are trying to read my thoughts......

Then come the instructions for use.  Each liquid is to be taken in two drops under the tongue, four times a day for one day.  And my husband needs to.....wait for it......stay as far away from electromagnetic fields as he can that day.

So, on a Sunday, we find ourselves in our bedroom void of the alarm clock, the laptop, cell phones, cell phone chargers, lamps, space heater, and power strip, all of which have been moved into the living room.  As I am able to come and go into and out of electromagnetic fields as I please, I slip out of the room to make us lunch and dinner and bring in things like candles so that we can entertain ourselves by reading and playing board games (both of which we enjoy but much more so when not trying to do it in the flickering candlelight). 

Twelve hours pass by so slowly when you are being glared at by a husband who has been forced to spend the day sitting on a bed in a quiet room without his video games.

Needless to say, this treatment got us nowhere.  My husband is now even more distrustful of my alternative suggestions than he was before. 

Oh, alternative methods, I have lost some faith in you!